Learning when not to trust

One of the hardest things is watching your children learn that not everyone in the world is kind and honest. My 13-year-old son recently learned this at his school. He had been bringing his IPOD to school to listen to music on the bus ride to and from school. He always kept it in his backpack which was with him.

However, during a track practice, he had left his backpack unlocked the locker room. While he was practicing, someone went through his backpack and took his IPOD. He was shocked and disappointed that someone would do this. It was a valuable lesson but certainly a tough one to go through.

Begging children to behave

I was shopping at Trader Joes when I overheard a mom struggling with her young daughter who was sitting in the front of their shopping cart. Mom was agreeing “OK, I’ll give you one money.” The daughter whined “Nooooo, I want TWO monies!” Mom fished around her purse and handed her a couple coins. The daughter then yelled “That’s not enough!” and began crying.

Mom begged her to please stop crying because she really needed to get this shopping done before they could go home. Mom was exasperated as her daughter continued to cry.

If you find yourself begging your kids to behave, it’s time to find some better parenting approaches! Learn some effective ways to set limits with your children while building loving relationships by taking the Priceless Parenting online parenting class.

Wisdom for handling challenging teen behavior

Teens provide parents many opportunities to grow their parenting skills! One of the most insightful and helpful books I've read for dealing with challenging teen behavior is Yes, Your Teen is Crazy! by Michael Bradley.

Bradley, a psychologist, provides practical parenting advice for dealing with difficult teen behaviors like drug and alcohol abuse, eating disorders, casual sex, rage and violence and skipping school. His writing is humorous while directly addressing difficult topics. He uses real life stories to contrast normal teenage behavior with behavior that requires parents seek professional help immediately.

All children's brains go through enormous changes during adolescence. Sometimes these changes combined with other stresses can lead to some crazy behavior. Bradley provides sound advice for parenting teens.

How much media is too much?

When parents discuss how much media they allow their children, the answers vary wildly. Some parents have very strict time restrictions on their children's media viewing while others give their children more control over the time they spend on media.

How do you know when your child is getting too much media?

One mom knew she needed to allow less video game time when her 7-year-old son started not wanting play outside or do things with the family preferring his video game instead. He was so attached to playing his video game that he often pitched a fit when he was told the game had to go off. His games didn't have a good way to save the game for later so he was reluctant to stop playing and lose his place in the game.

She decided to reduce his video game playing to one hour twice a week. She started giving him a 10 minute warning before his hour was up. When the 10 minutes were up, he could either choose to shut the game off or she would turn the power off. It only took a couple times of turning the power off to get him to shut the game down in time.

What are signs that digital usage is becoming a problem?

(read the rest of the article at Priceless Parenting)

Parenting discussion on talk radio

This week's "A Life on Fire" radio show discussed parenting through difficult times. We used the book Willow, a story of a teen who turns to cutting to deal with emotional pain, to begin the discussion. We branched into a number of other parenting topics. You can listen to it here (the parenting discussion starts about 9 minutes into the show recorded on June 17, 2009):

http://www.contacttalkradio.com/hosts/archives/kloter-pagano.html

I had fun working with the show's hosts Elise Kloter and Jill Pagano. I hope you'll have a chance to listen to it!

Warning signs for parents

Parenting would be easier if there were warning signs along the way similar to the warning signs along a road. All parents want to know when sharp curves are approaching, where to tread lightly because of thin ice and exactly where the dangerous drop-offs are located!

By understanding the potential problem areas, you are more likely to able to steer clear of them. For example, knowing that two and three-year-olds will have tantrums can make handling these inevitable meltdowns easier by allowing you to plan your response. Likewise, knowing that multi-player internet games are highly addictive can help you decide whether or not those games are something you will allow your children to play.

Taking a parenting class is one way to learn what to expect along the bumpy road of raising children. The Priceless Parenting online parenting class is available wherever you are located and is designed to help you avoid parenting pitfalls!

Books leading to deep discussions

Reading books together with your children can launch some wonderful discussions that would otherwise probably not happen. I recently read the book Willow by Julia Hoban. The book is about a 16-year-old girl who is driving her parents home when they get into an accident in which both parents are killed. The story describes her struggle to deal with the aftermath of this tragedy and how she turns to cutting herself as a way to deal with the pain.

It is a griping book that deals with a tough subject in a way that provides insight on some of life’s big issues. Reading this book with your teen could lead to discussing things like:

• Problems caused when serious feelings are held inside instead of expressed
• Difficulties talking to someone about the death of someone they love
• Skills involved in being able to listen compassionately
• How people ignore “the elephant in the room” to avoid raising difficult issues
• Importance of having true friends especially in challenging times

Teens are often ready and willing to tackle some of these complex issues and a book like Willow can open the door to some wonderful discussions.